by Craig Mayes on August 2nd, 2010

Today my youngest son, Caleb, turned 18. No more children. All adults. I joked today that my job as a parent was done- I helped them all reach adulthood, and now I could retire as a dad. But of course, that is not true. Certainly my role has evolved from changing diapers to reading books, to teaching them to ride a bike and play tennis, and helping them navigate matters of faith and values and choices.  I have loved every aspect of it, every season of fatherhood. It went by too fast, even though at times it seemed like we were running in place. I get sentimental about things like this, so today as I golfed with Caleb, played tennis and enjoyed dinner as a family, I felt both joy and sorrow. If I could do the 18 years over again there are so many things I would do differently. It’s impossible to live and escape the inevitable regrets of having been so much less than perfect. Life teaches us lessons that we can’t apply when we need them most.

Today, August 18, Caleb literally leapt into adulthood, and I jumped with him. We are visiting Chris’ parents in Port Huron Michigan. They live on the St. Clair River about a mile south of Lake Huron. The current is swift. The dock stretches out about 30 feet from shore and is about 6 feet off the water. It was dark out, the water was dark, and even though we had made the jump hundreds of times over the years in the daylight, there was something fearful (and exhilarating) about leaping into the uncertainty of the darkness.

We were under the water just long enough for it to go from August 1^st to August 2^nd, and for Caleb to go from child to adult. We came up laughing, climbed the ladder quickly, and neither suggested a second jump!

As we toweled off, I thought about the uncertainty and challenges ahead for Caleb. I know that he will see it as an adventure, just as he did this leap into the water. I had suggested the idea at about 10:30 PM, thinking he would never go along with it. He called my bluff! My hope for both of us is that we continue to embrace the joy and challenge and adventure of life with a certain sort of reckless abandon and risk.

On another note, today offered another milestone, this one for me.  I mentioned that we golfed today. In the pro shop of the Leaning Tree Golf Course the clerk at the desk asked me my age. When I told her I was 12 days from turning 55, she said she’d give me the senior discount 12 days early. So I made officially made the leap today into senior adulthood. I hope when I am 65 I am still jumping off docks into dark water at midnight…maybe with a grandson or granddaughter.